Ripped off

Over the last few months i have quietly been noticing various loss of movements in fingers, toes, feet & hands & also been suffering sharp immense pains from this.


Also having problems with my neck and back i kept pushing it to the sideline all the while having other more important matters to deal with.


Relocating,  Having a sick baby,  The list could go on and on.
But its now got to a point where i had to get this sorted and find out whats going on with me.


Went to the Dr's finally on Monday & expressed my issues to which i was devastated after having x-rays and examination to find i have Psoriatic Arthritis and would have a long list of medical issues for the rest of my life also requiring pain relief treatment etc in Brisbane asap.


Being so young for this the Dr felt really sorry for me and was just so lovely.


I went home feeling really ripped off
Really REALLY RIPPED OFF
"Why me?" Seriously why me????
Have i not been through enough this year?.


Have i not been punished enough for things i have obviously done to deserve the heartache i have been through this year??


I at times struggle to hold LJ as i thought i was holding her nice and firm and had a good grip but then suddenly my hands wont work, my fingers arent doing what they should be..
She slipped out off my hands .
Luckily i was only on the couch but that really scared me.


How would i cope being away from family & friends with Hayds away loosing 50% loss of movements in my hands and feet?


What about my love of crafts ???


Next day i had to head to Mackay to have treatment on my Spine and have 14 different bloods taken.


On the way home after quietly sitting there getting my head around this situation i decided..


I cant sit around being gutted about this i must be strong for my girls and fight this the best i can.


I will get fit
I will eat healthy
I will get my body in the best shape to fight this and prolong the outcome as long as i can.


Back to the Dr today i have more results =
Every finger on my hands has thinned badly  at the bones and has worn away at the joints which is what is causing the excruciating pains.
As well as my feet and toes.


Which is why my foot has grown an extra bone called a Spur.
My bones thinned in my feet which causes injury so my body grew an extra bone (which is still growing & will need to be surgically removed ) to protect the injury.


I have Osteoperia


More testing to be done January 5th where we wait with baited breath afterwards to find out if i have Osteoporosis.


The upside being =
I may be lucky and just have these too and not the Psoriatic Arthritis (even though i have every symptom listed for it)


I have got my head around this now and there fore wish to share my journey along the way in the hope i will find positivity from my previous blogs on low days that will come.


I will take each day as it comes  
Enjoy every moment
and  smile..

As I'm still living after all aren't I !!!!!!!!!