Beautiful Sleep

Sleep 
I love everything about sleep yet don't get the luxury of enjoying it very often at all.


All my life i have suffered server sleep issues and from earliest memories i recall being stuck awake at night oh so wishing to just be able to sleep.


I recall staying down the Marlborough sounds ,NZ at my grandparents house June and Lionel Hawkins.
All us 3 girls being tucked away upstairs in our room all together nattering away non stop until one by one my sisters fell asleep then there was just me, Left wide awake desperate to just get to sleep now the fun was over.


My Nana would come in late at night to see if we were asleep and every time sure enough id be wide awake in bed.
So on numerous occasions she would take me off downstairs with her and make me a milky Milo to help to settle me enough to sleep (hopefully).


You see my Nana suffers the same sleep issues and has told me she to lies awake in bed hours on end just trying to get to sleep.


What makes matters worse for me in particular is my Grandad (Jeffery Best) Suffered from Sleep problems as well, So does my Mother Suzanne Hargreaves & other family members from that side.


From a very young age i recall sleep overs at friends where it could be quite horrible as you don't no the house or the family to well & cant exactly  get up & try get a hot drink or anything so you would just lie there for what seemed like the whole night.


I had a friend (Vanessa was Barron then Williams) and i remember staying at her house but she used to have a radio in her room & couldn't get to sleep without it being on.
That was a nightmare for me as when i do finally sleep it has to be silent.


I awaken to every creek or crack any movements or birds tweeting, literally anything I'm such a light sleeper.


So never have i experienced a really decent sleep as such, its always broken and max only ever 5 hours a night and that's on a rare occasions.


Ive been to the Dr so many times where they suggest relaxation techniques then sleeping pills the list goes on and on.


The reality is nothing ever works.


Its always driven me up the wall how my sister can fall asleep so quickly and sleep so soundly yet i cannot.


When we were younger we used to have bedrooms side by side & for years would do a cough as a way of letting each other no if we were still awake. 
I'm unsure whether mum ever knew about it.


My husband falls asleep within 5minutes of his head hitting the pillow & i am forever envious of him.
I unfortunately at times wake him up in the night just to have someone to talk to when i cant sleep and get sick of lying there awake by myself.


Its not just one thing, Its everything about Sleep.
I cant get comfy and i cant switch off...
My brain goes into overdrive and i recall everything that's taken place that day, plan days ahead and come up with wonderful ideas in this time but drives me bananas.


It wasn't until i had children that i really suffered though because at least all those years prior it was just getting to sleep that was the issue,  then once i would get to sleep i would get a few hours in a row which would be enough to get me by.


As all parents no children don't work like that there is always something teething,sick, if its not one its the otherwaking them during the night.


So on the regular like last night & every night for the last week i have just finally got to sleep at 12pm then bang on the dot within 15mins Lacey-Jay wakes teething really bad (shes getting a big back tooth) and she is awake roughly for 30mins but once she goes back to sleep i cant then fall back into bed in a tired heap & go back to sleep, I have to start the process all over again.


Therefor the last 2,3/4 years Ive got by on next to no sleep.

Its amazing what the body can do on little to no sleep and you get by , by the smell of an oily rag. (Or in my case enough coffee to get me through).


This is by no means a Blog from me to moan grizzle or gripe about my issue its more to raise awareness and purely because I'm interested to know who if anyone out their suffers these very issues as me???


Because if i could find the answer to sleeping i wouldn't be writing this i would fast asleep tucked up snug and cozy in bed zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz